Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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