Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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