You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
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she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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