I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
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I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
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my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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