what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
