yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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