peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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