it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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