People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
