i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
