You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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