One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I am midnight drunk by noon
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
vagina is talking i cant
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
