Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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