no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
