you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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