batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Randomize
