So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
