i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
