he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize