at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
