Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize