It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
