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no one should ever give us hovercrafts
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Randomize
