I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
