Jerry, you need to find god
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
there is puke in my bra ... again
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
