I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
