It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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