i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
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