East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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