so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
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U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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