I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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