I understand Curling. That high.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Randomize
