I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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