I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
