Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
