Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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