Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
no. you can't hotbox the world.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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