i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
