it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Randomize
