she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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