I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
