i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
