Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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