I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
not ubering you a puppy
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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