just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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