what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Randomize
