My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
