Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
