worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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