her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
