I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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