my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
